Life, for Two Days, A Carnival

One of my most favourite songs has a popular doha as a refrain, ‘kya leke aaya jagat mein? Kya leke jayega? Do din ki zindagi hai, do din ka mela’ (What have you brought to this world? What will you take along? This life is of two days, a carnival for two days.) I often go back to this line whenever I seek solace about anything unpredictable happening in life—which is almost always!Just the week before when I was quite smug about myself not being obsessed with my looks, I scrubbed my nose a little too hard and created a bruise. To the mirth of my colleagues, I had a purple nose throughout the week. The first two days, I tried to hide it in vain, with a little bit of face cream and concealer. But the weather forced me to break out into a sweat and lo and behold, my purple nose was there for all to see. Then, I thought to myself, why did it hurt so much that someone laughed at my nose, and that too, for less than a minute. Yet, the burden of it weighed on my mind the whole day. This clear skin exists today and will be gone tomorrow. Similarly, an acne will exist today and will be gone tomorrow. In between this impermanent breakout, there is already a circus of one person laughing and another crying. How true are the lines that this drama is not going to last for more than a couple of days! .The reminders just wouldn’t stop…I had to shift to a new flat in a new city. While I was a little homesick, I took an immediate liking to the house. Primarily because the front gates and the stairway were adorned by jasmine creepers. The sweet fragrance of the flowers in bloom reminded me of my mother offering the garlands at puja. It took me back to memories of my aunts and grandmothers who would lovingly wear them at festivals, to temples and on any good occasion. Quite happily I got on a video call with my mother and flaunted to her the fence in bloom. Little white jewels on green velvet, fresh after monsoon showers. I spoke about the plants and flowers to anyone who would listen. Lo and behold, all the buds withered soon and there were no new buds for another fortnight. The plant had its own timeline to bloom. Here, I was, anchoring my happiness and comfort to something as temporary and tender as a jasmine flower on a rainy afternoon. The sweet fragrance left behind a stinking message. I was yet to make peace with the impermanence of life..As work takes me from city to city every other fortnight, I keep meeting new faces. Sometimes, it is easy to befriend someone and at other times it takes a while to find a friend. In some offices the coffee machine functions to my liking and serves exactly to my preference. In yet another office, I make do with a watery tea that is nowhere close to giving comfort or nutrition. For two weeks, I hold on to a chair in one office, only to realise upon my return that someone else has grabbed it in my absence. ‘My desk’, ‘my chair’, ‘my coffee’, ‘my friend’... Where am I going to carry all these possessions? And why do I put my happiness in all of them?The song ends with the lyrics, ‘bhavsagar se tar le bande, Hari gun gayle, do din ki zindagi hai, do din ka mela’ (Friend, swim across this material ocean, sing the glory of Hari, this life is only of two days, the carnival is only for two days.) I now humbly try.